The end of a marriage is an emotionally charged time when decision-making is, at best, impaired. Going through a complicated legal process presents challenges as well. While some spouses choose to fight it out in court, other soon-to-be exes have taken a more collaborative approach.
Taking a divorce to trial, particularly when children are involved, takes significant time and money. It can also result in resentment and anger that never goes away. Post-marital life can become contentious with continuing disputes over the smallest of issues.
A more cooperative and peaceful process
Collaborative divorce seems like an oxymoron. However, it is an effective way to resolve differences and come to an agreement without the stress and animosity that is inherent in far too many marital dissolutions. The best benefit of the collaborative approach is that you have control, not a judge rendering a decision that one side finds unacceptable.
Collaborative divorce is not about winning or losing. It is about focusing on both spouses’ needs and finding resolutions that work for two people as they start their new lives. A cooperative process can also establish a foundation for healthy co-parenting instead of using children as “pawns” in what can become a petty “chess game.”
While collaboration saves time, it also saves money that would have been spent on a protracted legal battle. Simply put, it is about looking forward, not back. In many cases, collaborative divorces are the only time couples spend in court, as opposed to continuing courtroom battles over the smallest of issues.
Divorce as a peaceful process may seem impossible, yet exploring and moving forward with that option can establish a foundation of couples – although apart – working together in the future.